Waking in my room this morning there is some sun coming thorough the window. Similar to last Saturday morning but entirely different. It wasn't even a week ago I learned of the 5 tumours in my brain yet in many ways I feel like it's been a month. Life is so strange.
Before I run out of energy - update is that two of the large tumours in the cerebellum will be surgical removed after this weekend, likely Tuesday (timing is never 100%) Maybe a third smaller one that's close by. That will entail cutting into my skull to open it up, removing bone and tumours and then sewing various things back up. It's a craniotomy although your google searches will result in many inaccurate results ;) Approximately 4-8 hours depending on complications - infection, bleeding, stroke, spinal fluid leak age, death etc. Any such surgery involves risks - mine are slightly higher given my spotted past issues. Good news is the surgical, nursing, internal medical teams are all amazing so best we can do. I have one more consult with anesthesia and will be doing some pre-op medication switches for safety.
If all goes well recovery will be several weeks before they can then can do another scan and hit the remaining smaller tumours with focused radiosurgery or as I think if it as the snipers. The one closest to my brain stem is the most positionally a problem as so much goes on in that section.
In all my other fights w cancer I have used my brain extensively not only to stay positive but to actually fight and visualize the cancer leaving. Its different now - any rapid thoughts cause me stress that these foreign masses will shift grow or change before we can get to them. So I have been really trying to keep calm. The steroid medication seems to be managing swelling symptoms so I just have to pray that continues until surgery.
Virtual love, prayers, thoughts and support from everyone continues to be an indescribable bubble of energy keeping me going so I graciously ask for more in coming weeks as things get very scary for me. I will conserve my energy on individual responses but each drop of love I read is truly appreciated.
And please do something joyful this weekend, laugh extra hard, and appreciate the mundane.
T
21 comments:
Morning Tricia 💟 You have a large number of supporters, so we will visualize the cancer leaving and will send love and prayers to you 💟 you have a wonderful medical team and a wonderful support team here we are all on your side! I hope you can rest, stay calm and enjoy the rays of sunshine. Thank you for the gentle reminder that life is precious and so are the ones around us! Love you, Sonia
Hi Tricia,
Through all your battles, I have kept you in my continuous novena. I finish a thanksgiving one on Monday and start a new petition one on Tuesday. You will be front and foremost in it and I will be sending heartfelt thoughts, visualizations and love to you then and throughout your recovery.
Betty Jo
Hi Tricia,
Therese here taking your advice and spending some happy weekend time with my Christine on Skype. Both of us are thinking of you and appreciate you keeping us updated - we loved the picture of you outside in the sunshine. Hoping everything this weeks goes well. I know I can speak for Mary too when I let you know all of us will keep sending thoughts, love and prayers to you across the miles.
💌Dear dear Tricia,
As I go through your account of what lies ahead for you, I can hardly believe that you are able to write with such detail, clarity and conviction about all that lies ahead for you.💻
🌱There is a thread of hope that runs through today's blog entry that inspires me to continue to believe in miracles, especially in the miracle that is YOU. 😍
Thank you for that!♥
🍷🍷This weekend, David and I will toast life and visualize the cancer leaving you as it has already done so many times before. I love the first moment of my day when I light your candle, see its brightness and feel the warmth of its flame.🎍 It brings you present to me then, and throughout my day.🌅
📖Earlier today, I read a passage in a book that made me laugh so hard that tears ran down my face. So, all in one day, Tricia, I have laughed as hard as I can and I have wept just as hard and I know how closely joy and sorrow are related.💔
💌I love you so much,
Louise
Hi Tricia,
The sun has come out in Toronto as well, so we took advantage of it and went for a long walk. We've been thinking of you all week and have been reading your updates. Thanks so much for sharing your feelings and thoughts.
We send our love and positive vibes for the week ahead.
Mireille and Mike xoxo
Dear Tricia,
We are sending our love, support and prayers for you.
Love, Michele & Brian
Liebe Tricia,
wir sind in Gedanken ganz fest bei dir und drücken alle Daumen, dass es Dir bald wieder besser geht und für Dich die Sonne wieder richtig scheint!!!
Wir wünschen dir und deiner lieben Familie viel Kraft und alles erdenklich Gute!
Liebe Grüße von deinen Freunden aus Deutschland
Oli & Familie
Tricia
Your acceptance and positivity has inspired and amazed me throughout your continuous challenges. As others have said, visualize success; and, remember what grandpa Luigi always said. " What happens is for the best."
Uncle Tony
Love and prayers, Tony and Carol
Hi Tricia
You are in our thoughts and prayers
Lots of love
Deanie and Uncle Ed
Hi Tricia,
Bob & I continue to send love and prayers. We will add visualization to what we have been doing.
Love you to the moon and back.
Mary Ellen & Bob
xoxo
Forgive me, when you said 'snipers' I immediately pictured you as a kickass superhero badass woman fully weaponized with an elite nano tech army to wipe out your enemy while being totally zen and focused at the same time. This brought me a lot of comfort- you go girl.
All my love,
Amanda & her minions
We are relieved to hear that you and your wonderful medical team now have an action plan. You remain in our hearts and prayers. Love Vivian and family
Dear Tricia, much love to you. Sending positive thoughts, prayers and love.
Marcia xoxo
We are sending so much love and healing thoughts to you, Tricia.
Barb
Hi Tricia,
Deb and I and all of your friends at Overture would like you to know that we are thinking of you and wishing you all the best tomorrow and during your recovery.
Matt
Miss Tricia
I did do something with you in mind this weekend and filled my heart with laughter! I wish you would have been beside me to take part. Thank you for the update and continued prayers and positivity!
Think of you constantly! Love Rob and Bonnie💕💕💕💕🙏🙏🙏
Tricia, I've always looked up to you and will take to heart your advice to be grateful and act joyful. Please know that Ellen and Amy's extended "friend family" is in your corner and have you in our thoughts and prayers. Sending good vibes, strength and healing energy your way xoxo
Dear Tricia,
Thinking of you as you prepare for your surgery. Loving thoughts and prayers are with you. I'm wearing my angel pin for you every day.
Love, Michele
XOXO
Dear Tricia,
You are in my mind and heart now and throughout this day.
Love and prayers,BJ
Dear Tricia,
Lots of love and prayers,
Bob & Mary Ellen
xoxoxo
💌Dear Tricia,
This morning we are thinking of each member of the surgical team that is gathering around you. Like you, we put our trust in them to go in and find the foreign masses that the medical and nursing teams have been managing in preparation for today.
We are confident that your own efforts to keep your stress levels down and stay calm have helped to make conditions in your brain just right for the work of those skilled people.
Sleep tight, Tricia. You are in the hands of experts in the operating room as surely as you are in the hearts and minds of your team of supporters around the world.
We love you,
Louise♥ and David♥
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