Mr. Potato Head

So my Cardio MRI and appointment with the cardiologist last Friday afternoon indicated my heart is faring ok with the chemo so far. A slight change but nothing reportable.  Great news.  Bloodwork this early morning looked pretty good as well - maybe even a slight improvement from last round. Whether my improved hemaglobin had anything to do with my focus on eating high iron and protein beef, spinach, quinoa over the past 4 days I'm not certain but I'm happy regardless. So all clear for Round 3.  The heart results even make it more likely I'll get the 6 rounds in.  Which is key for me - this door has to get closed, but I want filler in all the cracks and a few extra nails to keep the risk of it reopening to a very small percentage.

Since my last post the grey lightened each day as I'd hoped and by week 3 I even tried a bit of work out for a few hours of each day.  I managed to get some tangible things done to contribute to a global internal project and enjoyed the taste or normal life that I was craving.  Also a bit more tiring than I had expected - turns out "week three good" is Sooooooo much better than "week three grey" but it is still not normal "pre chemo normal life good".  In any case, got through the week and managed a few visits with friends and family, knowing the storm is coming tomorrow.

I explained to a few that saw me this past while, as a blonde or brunette, that I probably look better than I feel when they complemented me on how well I look.  I'm kind of like a Mr. Potato Head right now...before I put on all my parts, my hearing aids, reading glasses, makeup, hair, breasts and neck banadages, I look a lot different.  But with parts ready to go, it seems to work and no one would guess I'm sick at all.  And while I don't have an issue with my bald head whatsooever, the energy it takes to even just respond to a stranger who gives you the sympathetic "look" is exhausting.  So sometimes the Potato Head allows for less energy lost.

I know all of you don't care what I look like and just love and support the potato and what's inside, and I'm so grateful that you do :)  Cheers

Chemo grey

Round 2 started well...no reactions to infusions, got my head shaved and was generally okay for the first day after.  Wore my new blonde (yes, blonde) wig to my monthly documentary movie with friends and hoped the new strategy for the hand/arm cramps experienced in round 1 would hold.  The cramps took over on the third day though, so I called the chemo line and got an additional med plan...which started to work on the following day, but basically kept me in a very flat, heavy state layered with muscle weakness and fatigue I call the dark grey of chemo.  It stayed like that for about 3 days.

Luckily this morning I had a little less weight and managed to get showered, get my wig and "stuffies" on and make it to the church for Jack and Davis' baptism.  It went well and I delivered on my godmother role - it was really a great afternoon, and it seems the light of the event allowed for some of the grey to fade slightly.  Anytime I feel improvement I am fueled by the hope of continued progress the following day.

Little Lucy just darted by mom, dad and I as we watched the Grammy's with my pyjamas in her mouth (yes they are bigger than her whole body) - can't help but laugh at her persistence for attention.

Tomorrow will be lighter grey.

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